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September 16, 2005

I came this close to telling a priest to go to hell

Last night was our weekly father/daughter outing. We started the night, as usual, at Wendy's. How quickly our order is taken dictates Frankie's behavior. If we're waited on quickly, Frankie stays by my side, but if it takes about 2-3 minutes, Frankie will not be restrained and runs laps around the Wendy's via the window sill. She's two and a half and, based on many observations, kids that age are generally pretty impatient and extremely active.

I didn't think much of it. After she took a lap around the "restaurant" and I was anxiously about to order, she started poking around in the cabinets just below the condiment counter. She was just doddling about; it was pretty benign behavior, she was slowly opening a salt packet and doing a little exploring. Nothing too destructive. I thought it was reasonable and no one seemed to be bothered ... except the priest behind me. He informed me in an authoritarian tone that child leashes exist and maybe I should consider getting one. After suppressing my strong desire to tell him where to go, I just nodded disapprovingly and let the old fart groan. Exasperated with me, he only said, "at least you're watching her". We finally got our food and that night she happened to be well behaved during her meal. I was afraid if she started throwing ketchup we might have been orderdered an exorcism.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

You could have asked him if he heard the one about the priest and the alter boy, that might have shut him up.

Matt S. said...

Yeah, you shoulda told him to stuff it. Or ask him how many children he has had and when he replies that he has none, tell him that isn't what you meant.

Anonymous said...

There were many responses that I could've given but in front of Frankie, I'm afraid none of them were appropriate. I just grumbled and let the old fart be.